When I was growing up, my family went to church every Sunday. From the outside, we probably looked like a Christian family, but inside our home there wasn't much peace. My parents fought constantly. My dad struggled with alcoholism and was abusive toward my mom. When I was six years old, my parents divorced, and my mom, sister, and I moved in with my grandparents and great-grandma for four years.

That season was incredibly hard. I struggled with suicidal thoughts from that time until I was in college. Even as a little girl, I felt like life was hopeless.

My sister and I still visited my dad on weekends, and we would go to church with him. He changed churches often because he didn't like hearing pastors challenge him about his drinking. At one of those churches, when I was about six or seven years old, my Sunday school teacher asked me a question that changed my life:

"Have you ever asked Jesus into your heart?"

I had grown up hearing about Jesus, but I had never really heard the message of salvation. That day she prayed with me, and I gave my life to Christ. I can't fully explain it, but something changed. I remember feeling joy, hope, and peace in a way I never had before.

Life didn't suddenly become easy.

Throughout elementary and middle school, I was severely bullied. I had very few friends. I would even try to tell my classmates about Jesus, and sometimes it only made the bullying worse. Over time, I began believing the lies people spoke over me—that I was ugly, worthless, stupid, that I'd never amount to anything, and that no one could ever love me.

But every summer my mom sent me to Circle C Ranch, a Christian camp. Those weeks became a lifeline for me. Every year I would leave on fire for Jesus. That camp reminded me who God was, even when I forgot who I was.

When school was difficult, I found comfort in spending time with God. I read my Bible, sometimes even bringing it to school, and I spent a lot of time reading and drawing. Looking back, I can see that even though I felt alone, God was quietly keeping me close to Him.

When I was ten years old, my parents remarried because they wanted my sister and me to have both parents together again. We moved into a new house, and for the first time in four years my sister and I each had our own bedrooms!

Not long after that, someone we trusted sexually abused both my sister and me.

That experience left me confused and ashamed. I believed something must have been wrong with me. I hid myself behind oversized clothes because I was terrified of attracting attention again. For years I carried shame that was never mine to carry.

As I got older, my low self-worth affected the choices I made. At the end of my junior year of high school, I started dating someone I met online, long distance. We argued constantly, but because I believed I wasn't worthy of better, I settled. After graduation I moved to Texas to be with him.

The relationship became abusive. He isolated me from my family and friends and constantly told me I was worthless and broken—that no one else would ever love me. Eventually the abuse became physical, and one day he nearly took my life.

During that season I cried out to God constantly. Honestly, there were times I felt completely alone.

One day I found a Beth Moore devotional at Walmart that talked about climbing out of your pit. I remember sitting there crying because, for the first time, I realized I was in one.

Around that same time, I kept returning to a verse that has carried me through so much:
“We have troubles all around us, but we are not defeated. We do not know what to do, but we do not give up the hope of living. We are persecuted, but God does not leave us. We are hurt sometimes, but we are not destroyed.” 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 (ESV).

I finally left that abusive relationship, but walking away wasn't the end of my healing—it was the beginning. Healing took time. I stayed close to God by staying in church, surrounding myself with people who loved Him, and spending time in His Word. Little by little, He began restoring the pieces of my heart that had been broken for so many years.

During that season, I made a decision that has shaped the rest of my life: the cycle of abuse that started in my family would stop with me. I wasn't going to let my past determine my future.

Today, God has blessed me with an incredible husband who loves me well, a wonderful family through him, and an amazing church family. I get to spend my life doing things I love, including creating artwork that points people toward hope, freedom, and the beauty God can bring from brokenness.

There were so many times I wanted to give up. There were days when my hope felt no bigger than a mustard seed. But I never stopped reaching for God, and He never stopped reaching for me. Looking back now, I can see that even the smallest amount of faith was enough for Him to work with.

One of the hardest parts of my healing was learning to forgive the people who had hurt me. Forgiveness didn't mean what they did was okay, and it didn't erase the pain. It meant I was choosing not to let bitterness keep me trapped. Sometimes forgiveness is a decision you make more than once, especially when old memories or emotions resurface. Each time, I choose to give them back to God.

Life still isn't perfect. My parents divorced again several years ago, but today my dad and I have a good relationship. He still struggles with alcohol, but we pray together, and I'm thankful for the relationship God has helped us rebuild.

If I'm honest, I still struggle sometimes with my self-worth and the way I see myself. Healing is still happening. But today, I know the difference between God's voice and the lies I believed growing up. The lies said I was worthless, broken, and unlovable. God says I am His.

One day I'll see myself completely the way He sees me. Until then, I'll keep trusting Him, keep growing, and keep believing that He finishes what He starts.

If there's one thing I hope you remember from my story, it's this: no matter what you've been through or what lies you've believed about yourself, God hasn't given up on you. If all you have today is faith the size of a mustard seed, that's enough. Keep running toward Jesus. He can bring hope where there seems to be none, healing where there is deep pain, and beauty from the most broken places. He did it for me, and He can do it for you.